Having a baby is a lot like swimming in a lake.
Before you get into a lake to swim, you don’t know how cold it will be or what kind of current is present. You may be able to see the other side, but you don’t know how long it will take you to get there. Typically, you can’t see the bottom and you may be on your own or in over your head at times.
For those of you with kids, you can relate. Getting from point A to point B can be a difficult journey with lots of ups and downs.
Eighty percent of new moms suffer from ‘baby blues,' a temporary psychological state after a baby is born. This is usually a time of extra sensitivity and symptoms include tearfulness, irritability, anxiety and mood changes, which tend to peak between three to five days after childbirth.
For most, this goes away after a week or two. Postpartum depression on the other hand tends to be gradual and may persist for many months. There is no diagnostic test for postpartum depression. However, it is important to understand that it is a real illness, and like a physical ailment, it has specific symptoms. Postpartum depression affects 1 in 7 moms and 1 in 10 dads. This equates to over 400,000 babies every year that are impacted and it's the number one complication of childbirth.
But mental illness is looked at differently than other health issues. Society (and often family) tells new parents ‘toughen up, you should be happy.' Some have gone as far as to say that, ‘postpartum depression doesn’t exist and moms/dads use it as an excuse to get out of the hard work of being a parent’. Yes, parenthood isn’t easy, but the mental and physical symptoms of postpartum depression are real, and this type of dialog is misleading and damaging and prevents parents from getting help.
When our children were born, we both suffered. Sara put on her ‘game face’ and never shared what she was thinking or feeling. Although, in hindsight, she showed physical symptoms that included weight loss, decreased motivation or interest in anything and the inability to sleep. Jeff also put on his ‘game face’ despite feeling distant, disconnected and fighting every instinct to flee.
The good news is postpartum depression is treatable, and even better, it is preventable! The challenge is that we have created an environment where asking for help is a sign of weakness. As a community, we need to reset parenting expectations and invest more in the wellbeing of families from the very beginning. The long-term impact will potentially eliminate many of the issues families face today by strengthening the bond between parent and baby.
Realizing the negative ripple effect of postpartum depression, Sara founded MomsBloom in 2008 to provide in-home support to any family after a baby is born. Trained volunteers provide non-judgmental support like preparing a meal, reading to a sibling or rocking the baby so mom can shower and rest. No task is too small, but it makes a big difference in the mental and physical wellbeing of the family and the community as a whole.
The success of this program has been overwhelming. But, we kept seeing a common theme: misinformation about postpartum depression and parents unnecessarily suffering. More had to be done. How could we get people to see past the stigma of mental illness and feel comfortable asking for help to get through these tough times?
From a brief chat in August 2011 came the idea to swim across Lake Michigan to raise awareness of postpartum depression. By swimming through the blue waters of Lake Michigan, we will work to inspire people to get through their ‘blues’ and be better prepared to create that happy family environment.
Through The Blue is a chance for us to give back. It’s a chance to show that we ALL face difficulties during these times of change and how we deal with and manage them is what’s important. There is a light at the end of the tunnel -- a beach to walk onto at the end, and a happy family to embrace. But, like our swim, this journey can’t be done alone.
The journey requires a strong support crew that can be reached at a moment's notice. This team of supporters is critical to our success in crossing the lake, and it’s critical to those suffering with postpartum depression.
On August 15, 2012, we will swim across Lake Michigan to prove to parents everywhere that you can overcome the stigma, get the help you need and build that happy family right from the start. We will suffer the ultimate endurance test to show that it’s possible to succeed against all odds.
Whether it’s your first or sixth baby, parents need to remember it’s not a competition. It’s a team effort and your team is waiting.
All you have to do is ask.
throughtheblue.org
facebook.com/throughtheblue
twitter.com/teamtow
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